Saturday, January 20, 2007

a little dab'll do ya

People, I ask you, what is the scariest sound the parent of a toddler can hear? Is it the sickening thunk of your child hitting the ground after a fall? Is it the horrific crack of a bone breaking? No, it is not*. The scariest sound the parent of a toddler can hear is...


Tonight I was trying to prepare dinner while also emptying the dishwasher and folding laundry (while my husband sat on his butt on the sofa, but that's a whole 'nother post right there, I'll tell you what). Daughter was in her bedroom looking at books, or so I thought. Suddenly I noticed how quiet it was in there, so I called her name. No response.

I dashed in to find her sitting calmly on the floor, dipping her fingers in the little cup of her Vicks Vaporizer and spreading Kaz inhalant through her hair. Her head was a greasy, mentholated mess, as were her hands. This was largely my fault, because I was being an idiot once again and I left the stupid vaporizer in there on the floor. Also she has been "helping" to wash her own hair in the tub lately, so I'm sure that was the inspiration for this little act. Lovely.

So add to the list of dinner, dishwasher, and laundry the task of hauling a menthol-coated toddler to the bathtub without getting any of the inhalant stuff in anyone's eyes or all over the furniture or anywhere else...

Oh and also? She figured out how to take down the baby gates today.

I'm pretty much screwed.

Hope you're all having a great weekend too!

*tongue in cheek, people. tongue in cheek.


Teresa said...

WOW... I KNOW you meant that tounge and cheek.. but it is true.. A EMT freind of mine said that the WORSE sign after a bad fall is when the child DOESN'T cry... that was what was worring me when I read that. That your daughter had fallen and had knocked herself out. On the flip side, Lil bit has been getting into things she shouldn't, and can climb just about anything.

Pam said...

Nothing truer has EVER been said! Silence, gets you every time.

When little D was about the same age as Daughter he discovered chocolate...So the house is far too quiet, I go looking for him and he his under his bunk bed, clear back by the wall knawing through a tootsie roll because he didn't know how to take the paper off.

What can I say, he takes after his dad:)

April said...

Yes, silence is horrific. Sounds like you got it all taken care of, or you wouldn't be posting, right? right. hahaaha

Also - I changed my blog URL:

Ann-Marie said...

yes silence is bad--found DD with my compact of lipsticks once--ALL over her, her clothes, the wall, the floor, the couch.
litte man actually had a bad fall with silence, and passing out and a trip to the ER this week.
how DOES vicks wash out???

HangerMom said...

The sound of a toddler tumbling down stairs is a close second, but silence is often even more dangerous... no doubt!

Ruth said...

Oh yeah. Your life is truly over. (did you at least swirl her hair into pretty patterns for pictures before you bathed her?)

Rebekah Smith said...

Add to the silence "what are you kids doing in there?" "Nothing". They are a joy, but can so easily stop our hearts. By the way, how do you wash vicks out of hair??