Sunday, August 31, 2008

nope, not yet!

I just realized it's been many days since I posted and I wouldn't want you all to get your hopes up on my behalf or anything.....that's right, STILL no baby.

Good heavens. This is getting ridiculous.

I have felt all along that it would be August 29th (no particular reason, I just looked at the calendar and said, August 29). Wrong!

Mom thought surely it would end up being August 31st, because that was my grandfather's (her father's) birthday and people in our family are just about universally born on someone else's birthday or anniversary. Well, it's almost 5 pm so there is still a chance, but I'm thinking no.

My doctor, many months ago, joked that maybe we will have the first baby born on Labor Day. Perhaps!

Along with the 'born on other people's birthdays' thing, maybe he will come on my sister's new husband's birthday - Wednesday, September 3rd.

But I'm thinking it's going to be a long slog through this coming week, and we will end up strolling into the hospital on the 8th to be induced. Oh well.

In the meantime, we're hanging at the beach enjoying the end of summer, taking naps in the warm afternoons, and knitting A LOT. I have some sweaters to show off tomorrow...but I have to get the camera out of the hospital bag which has been living in the car for the past 3 weeks.

Happy labor day - here's hoping it really will be!

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

new plan

I had my 39 week appointment this morning and NOTHING IS HAPPENING.

But that's ok, because now we have a plan. Baby has until September 8 to come out on his own or we are evicting him by force. I'd kind of prefer not to have to be induced, so it would be nice if he would make an appearance before that, but I am comforted knowing there is a plan in place to get the show on the road.

My doctor promises me I will not be pregnant past September 8. Good enough!

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

let's talk about something else

Maybe if we ignore him, he'll get upset and come out!

Let's talk about knitting instead of babies, yes? (Or at least knitting for babies...)

Just a few things...

Baby's blanket has been done since the night my boyfriend Michael Phelps won his 8th and final gold medal. I was working on the border as the race took place and dude, did I ever knit fast watching that. Yowza!

Here's a closeup of the pattern. I really love it - and it's a good thing, because it's a large project and takes a loooooong time to knit for some reason. I made the same blanket for Daughter in a sage green, so now they're matchy-matchy.

The yarn is just some Caron acrylic (not the cheesy soft stuff, but more akin to Red Heart...can't think of the name just now). It was tough on my hands, but I do like acrylic for the baby blankets that will get washed and used a lot. Holds up really well...Daughter's still looks just about as good as it did when it was first made. And after washing, it is surprisingly soft and drapes beautifully. I used US size 9 and 10.5 needles, and the pattern is from a Leisure Arts book called "Beautiful Baby."

My latest knitting obsession is this new yarn from Red Heart - Heart & Sole sock yarn. This is the best product I've ever used from Red Heart. It has actual wool content! I originally bought the bright yarn you see made up into the socks on the left (colorway: "spring stripe") to put in my hospital bag when I thought I was having a c-section. When baby turned, I figured I'd race him to the finish and see if I could just get the socks done for Daughter. Hmmmm. No problem there.

Then, because I liked working with the yarn so much AND because I had a coupon, I went back to AC Moore and got another skein (colorway: "toasted almond"). I found out all the colors don't stripe the same, so these socks are fraternal. Got those done over the weekend.

And today, I simply couldn't help myself. I stopped once again at AC Moore and picked up two more colorways: "congo" on the left in the photo, and "rustica" on the right.

Hey, you can't beat it for quality, inexpensive, entertaining knitting! One skein costs me $2.60 if I use a 40% off coupon, and I get both a pair of warm winter socks for Daughter AND several hours of knitting fun. And it is a good yarn, people. Washes up fantastically well. I can't wait for cool weather so Daughter can start wearing these.

They are knit up on US size 2 needles over 48 stitches.

A simple top-down raglan cardigan sweater for baby boy. If home heating costs are truly going to be as high as they say this winter, we will all need to bundle up in some woolly warmth.

I'm also trying out a new yarn - this is Caron Country, a wool/acrylic blend. It comes in stunning colors and is almost unbearably soft. This is the charcoal colorway, which I chose because it was boyish and goes with most everything. I love the look and feel, but it's a bear to knit up. It is not tightly spun, so the plies split all over the place. I have to watch while I knit it, which stinks for a simple project like this. Usually I can knit one of these while I watch a movie, read blogs, or whatever. Not so this time. Oh well, it is only a 6-month size so it is going quickly. I've just divided for the sleeves and will zoom through the body portion in the next day or so. If I have enough yarn I'll add a hood for extra warmth.

Let's see...can I finish it before he comes? That's a challenge, baby boy - you hear me??

Aaaaaaaaaand, because I seriously fell off the wagon with the yarn purchasing today, I had to grab a skein of the new colorway of Lion Fisherman's Wool. I have a bunch of skeins of the natural color, but now they have "nature's brown" and I luuuuuuuurve it. I will use this one skein to make a top-down cardigan for Daughter, and if I like it I will get 3 or 4 more to make a cardi for myself. Not, like, immediately - I know my knitting time will be tragically cut short until at least Christmastime once baby comes - but it's nice to have some simple projects planned out. I picture these sweaters with either leather buttons or wooden toggle buttons. Classic, hearty, and warm.

Well, now my back hurts and my stomach is growling, so I'm going to make several attempts to stand up from the couch and go get a snack. And just a wee bit of baby info for you: as of this morning's bpp, he is still head-down, still shoving his feet up into my ribs, and still adorable. Oh, and still INSIDE. Arrgh. :)

Monday, August 25, 2008

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

good job, internet!

Well, I don't know what you all did - did someone organize a mass headstand without me knowing about it? Whatever it was, it worked, and baby boy has flipped himself BACK TO HEAD-DOWN.

So thank you. Now I can at least go into labor with one less fear (a foot or cord presenting first).

Last night I was having some contractions that felt worse than braxton-hicks, but not nearly as bad as the real deal, so hopefully that means things are on their way to getting started. I'll see my doctor this afternoon and - yee hah! - have one of those very pleasant late pregnancy pelvic exams to see what's going on.

As an aside, in the category of "crappy bedside manner" I want to nominate the sonographer who did my bpp yesterday. When we expressed great relief at baby's head-down status, she gleefully said, "doesn't mean he'll stay that way!"


Saturday, August 16, 2008

i swear i am not making this up

Earlier this evening I was measuring Daughter for some new winter socks I'd like to make her. When I was done she took the measuring tape and proceeded to "measure" me and make little "notes" in her notebook. Then the following conversation took place:

Daughter: I have to measure Daddy when he's done mowing the lawn.

Me: Ok, sounds good.

D: I have to measure his belly.

Me: ?

D: Do you know why? Because I'm going to sew him a shirt!

Me: Oooh! Daddy will love that.

D: I'm going to sew him a white t-shirt. And it will have PINK letters on it!

Me: Oh? And what will the letters be?

D: H-O-T-T!

Me: (barely stifling hysterical laughter) Awesome!

D: Yeah, and he will wear it for work!

For the record, Daughter knows how to spell and write many, many words, but I'm 99.9% sure she had no idea what she was saying here, which makes it extra, extra funny.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

the plan

Well, no dice. If my stubborn baby does not turn himself around by next Tuesday or Wednesday (my next two appointments), we score ourselves a scheduled c-section.

Not my first choice, but given the alternatives, it is for the best. I have made peace with it, and now I'm just hoping I don't go into labor before we can schedule the procedure - I'd rather it be 'planned' than 'emergency.'

In the meantime, please think head-down thoughts for us! There's always a chance he could turn...


Huh. Now this morning I am feeling what I would GUESS are feet slamming me under the ribcage. Unless my dear boy has turned completely upright and is currently "raising the roof," it could be that he has settled his head back down and is kicking upward. I definitely feel two distinct "hits" and I am hoping it is two feet.

Probably not, but a girl can dream. We'll see what the doctor says this afternoon.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

am i getting insufferable yet?

This morning I completed the tour de doctors at my OB's office. I see one particular doctor for my care, but any of the 4 in the practice could be at the hospital when I deliver, so I get to see them all toward the end of my pregnancies. Fun fact: "my" doctor hasn't delivered any of my babies yet. I'm hoping he will be there this time.

So this morning I saw the newest doctor, who happens to be a woman. She was nice enough, but appeared to be barely older than I am, and I didn't love her bedside manner. She informed me that we can either schedule an external cephalic version, or schedule a cesarean section for 39 weeks. My baby is not actually full breech right now - he is transverse (laying across my abdomen folded in half so his feet and head are pushing against my right side). So he could possibly turn by himself and get head-down. The ECV might work out because it is more likely to be successful with a transverse baby (rather than a baby that must be turned entirely around). If they do the ECV, it is done in the hospital and labor is induced at the same time to prevent the baby from flipping back. It can be painful and have complications, though, so if we do it I could very well end up with an emergency c-section. Barf. NOT my first choice.

This chick doctor was pretty into the idea of a scheduled c-section...she seemed to think that considering my history I might prefer it. Which, ok, I can see the benefit of a scheduled delivery, but she actually stated avoidance of the trauma of a vaginal delivery as one of the reasons.

Huh? How is being slit from stem to stern and having abdominal muscles cut and sewn back together less traumatic than a regular vaginal birth?? I had great recoveries from my previous deliveries and, despite my apprehension about the pain of labor, I was really looking forward to another good experience in that regard.

Oh well, when I explained that I have a 3 year old to care for as well, she made a face and admitted that the recovery is a bit long for a c-section. Well, duh.

Tomorrow I go back to meet with my regular doctor so we can discuss options. I know this probably sounds stupid to some people, but I really just wish someone would tell me what to do. I obviously want the safest thing for baby and for myself - I don't want it to be up to me, I want the doctor to say "this is what we're doing" and set it up.

More to come.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

not what i was hoping to hear

Sonographer: Sooooooo...does your doctor know your baby is breech?

Me: ..........

Hubs: ..........

Me: (tears flowing)

7 lbs, 2 oz, measuring 38 weeks 5 days, and facing the wrong damn direction.


Monday, August 11, 2008

this and that

Dear Son,

Please stop trying to push your way out butt-first through my belly button. That hurts.



Well, as evidenced by my last post, I have my good days and bad days. That last post was on a very bad day indeed. I was in a lot of pain and really struggling. Baby is so low, and the underside of my belly actually aches and the skin hurts. I've never quite experienced that before so it's difficult to deal with, especially as I try to deal with an energetic 3 year old.

So I apologize for the bitching and moaning.


Tomorrow is my baby girl's birthday. I'm struggling with that this year, more so than last. I'm not sure why that is, but it's a bit of a challenge to keep from crying just now. Exactly two years ago this minute I was lying in a hospital bed, surrounded by random people and machinery, absorbing the knowledge that the baby in my belly was no longer alive. I suppose that would make anyone cry, to think about how that might feel. I went through it, and I still don't know what to think - I find myself looking back in a detached state of wonder, like, how did I live through that?

But I did. And sometimes it still feels really fresh. Especially now, as I close in on my due date. I mean, the best and worst experiences of my life happen(ed) in the exact same place under almost identical circumstances. That's screwed up, man. And tomorrow, on her actual birthday, we will be at the same hospital for another biophysical profile of baby brother. Oy. Is it any wonder I'm an emotional basket case these days? For real.


Here is what helps: knitting like mad and watching the Olympics. Seriously! How can you be sad while watching Michael Phelps? I was a competitive swimmer for many years and watching those Olympic swimming races brings it all back. So awesome to see such physical prowess. Plus, I cannot lie, the man is the HOTness. What? It's ok, I can say that, my husband openly ogles the beach volleyball players and I'm cool with that.

Also, chocolate chip cookies. Those help too.

Here is what I am racing to finish before baby arrives:

I made the identical blanket for Daughter in the days leading up to her birth, but her blanket is sage green because we didn't know she was definitely a girl. I'm into the third (and final) repeat of the pattern, hoping to get it done before I go into labor.

So. BPP tomorrow, then 37-week OB appointment on Wednesday, where we will find out if any progress is being made.

Friday, August 08, 2008

36.5 weeks and counting

Hello there. Still here. Still very, very pregnant.

I haven't been posting because I don't know what to say. I am quite uncomfortable and starting to get anxious and nervous about labor and delivery (well, not so much the delivery part as I'll be comfortably numb from the waist down by that point). Despite all our positive tests and examinations I remain on pins and needles about my baby and will feel that way until he finally arrives.

Time is dragging and flying by at the same time, if that is possible. It's making me crazy. Every twinge I feel sends me into a tizzy of "oh dear, what's that, is that pain? A contraction? What's happening? Is it time?" even though I know it is not yet time. Still, my bag is mostly packed and ready to go, just in case. Grandma and Papa are on alert to come get Daughter. The house is mostly clean and I'm focused on keeping up with the laundry as much as possible. I'm filling the freezer with simple-to-prepare foods and baked goods. There are juice boxes galore in the fridge so Daughter can serve herself in those first hazy days after baby arrives.

I'm ready. And yet I'm petrified. What's up with that?